Are there any significant experiences you have had, or accomplishments you have realized, that have helped to define you as a person?


.......uhhhhUHHHuhhh, wuts?!

So much things happened to me since January, since my last update. I genuinely miss my LJ, and the freedom it brought with it. It's been a long four months, and I'm glad to be back. :D

There are words that aren't left to be said, phoned or spoken; there are words that are especially made to be written. I've got all the reason to write and all the reason to laugh, yet I lack the energy to jot down the remains of the ghost that I once was, to celebrate what I've wanted the most and to regain my vigor and youth. I've seen it coming yet I was surprised to see the sky shed some tears, tears of joy perhaps? Tears that would be dried by the wind and wiped off by the heart who has never left its side. Forgiveness is too big a task, a tree to tall to climb, but maybe, just maybe, I would climb that tree. Armed with enough heart to reach further than the stars, just on time to catch the next bus to blessed delight :)

Drama Practice,
Go Prod.
Sweeney Todd,
The best.
Shoe Shopping,
Eat A lot.
The Ultimate Soiree,
Met people.

Fun, Fun, Fun!
No regrets.

Musical: Sweeney Todd
Song: Johanna
ANTHONY:

I feel you, Johanna,
I feel you.
I was half convinced I'd waken,
Satisfied enough to dream you.
Happily I was mistaken,
Johanna.
I'll steal you, Johanna,
I'll steal you.

[dialogue]

I'll steal you, Johanna,
I'll steal you.
Do they think that walls could hide you?
Even now, I'm at your window.
I am in the dark beside you,
Buried sweetly in your yellow hair!
I feel you, Johanna,
And one day I'll steal you!
Til I'm with you then,
I'm with you there,
Sweetly buried in your yellow hair!

Clues: "Professional Tolerator"
Sydney Cheers, Dead Discipline, Epileptic Citar, Weenie Sap, Force sizzle

*(Thank you! 10 times >_<)

Oh, the suspense and the craze, that One distant gaze, blurred the sight Of that One. Looking through crystalline glass, drinking lemonade, what assurance does One have, that it's joy won't fade? To think and to lie, "oh, the irony of a sigh!", after the laughter and fame.

hahaha. Yes, what a shame.

The young man always forgives and always forgets,
The old man never forgives and never forgets,
The wise man always forgives but never forgets,
and the dumb man never forgives but always forgets.

Which one are YOU?

So there's this dude I'm friends with. He wants me to write about him while I dare him to approach the girl in red at java man. I wonder how he's doing. Hey paul. Comment.

I'm reading two books. One is called "Attitudes that Attract Success" by John Maxwell and "How to Find your One True Love" by Bo Sanchez. After hearing about it from a curious source, I've learned that I have to be a bumblebee to be successful and I think that I'm wearing the wrong kind of shoes. It's scientifically impossible for a bumblebee to fly away because of the weight of his body and the length of his wings, and yet he flies, because no one told him that he can't. That's thinking that you can. And yes, I think I'm wearing the wrong kind of shoes, whatever way you put it. Women are too particular about their shoes. They look through every store and try on dozens of pairs of shoes until they find the right one. That's the way women should react when it comes to choosing their guy, and it says that have the wrong shoes on. No, it says that I should only walk with my bare feet.

Hmm, really now? We'll see.

hmph, hmph, hpmh.
I gotta wear it off! I gotta wear it off!
It has to go away! It has to go away!
phhhbt. arrrrrgh.
Oh.... Who am i kidding?! 0_o

AGAIN, 10 THINGS TO KEEP (heh.@_@) OCCUPIED:
1. purposely lose yourself in a crowd
2. skyjump from a 233 m tower
3. smile at cute cantonese waiters and school boys
4. eat ducks and pigeons and pretend that they aren't ducks and pigeons
5. wrestle a half-priced blouse away from a talkative middle-aged lady
6. look innocent when the staff check up on her
7. prance around amusement parks and clown around casinos
8. eat sour skittles and melted altoids while on public transportation
9. pretend to puke them out afterwards
10.think of home and fool yourself yet AGAIN.

NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING. NOT ANYTHING.

She wakes.

A phrase left unexplained, a song left incomplete, she left her body to drain and to dance on unpunctured beat. She spins on her first day back eager for the warmth, for the feel of perfectly aged wine and old summer's sunshine. She fed on the memory and the thirsted for its worth, she reminisced till she fell flat on the cold, sullen earth. What a fool she must have been to fall, to be weakened into another limp doll. Spin, spin, spin. Her toes are bleeding but she won't mind, she'll definitely be loved in time. With a skilled hand he holds her shin at the tip of a string, like a top. Spin, spin, spin. He has on a scheming grin and a mask of deep red. It momentarily satisfies her as he winds her through Faustus'path, a path trodded still by girls of youth and naivety, of dreams and aspirations. Aspirations killed in time, dreams turned to myths and youth aged to nothingness. She is caught up by his foul words of compassion and his false notions of empathy. She is under his spell.

She knows.

After all of those thoughts and last-minute conclusions, I guess the bottomline would be that I like you without reason, I like you just because. </3 Wow, that's good to know (and to admit ^_~).

She has grow accustomed to the long stretch of road that kept her distanced from the memories of her past. She ponders about the possibilities and the probabilities of getting a slight "feel" of her childhood. She pretends to close her eyes and anxiously awaits the screech of brakes and the tinkling of coins as she sets foot on grounds that she knows all too well.

She looks upon the horizon as she approaches the alluring embrace of home.
She takes a step back and she is reminded of days when night cracks into daylight and the scent of garlic awakes her. She is reminiscent of the times when fictional characters occupy her thoughts and pastel colors still satisfied her taste. She is nostalgic of the moments when small stuffed animals and a maternal scent comforted her in times of trauma. She is enticed by her long lost attraction to life's possibilities and trust in general. She is mourned by the loss of her naivety and her natural openness. She is thrilled by her anxiety and she suddenly feels skittlish.

She stops. Rethinks.

"There is no other place that I'd rather be."

Buses and Trains by Bachelor Girl

Hey Mom
Why didn't you tell me
Why didn't you teach me a thing or two
You just let me go
Out into the World
You never thought to share what you knew

So I walked under a bus
I got hit by a train
Keep falling in love
Which is kinda the same
I've sunk out at sea
Crashed my car, gone insane
And it felt so good
I want to do it again

Hey Mom
Why didn't you warn me
Coz about boys is something i should have known
They`re like chocolate cake
Like cigarettes
I know they're bad for me
But I just can't leave 'em alone

So I walked under a bus
I got hit by a train
Keep falling in love
Which is kinda the same
I've sunk out at sea
Crashed my car, gone insane
And it felt so good
I want to do it again

I wanna do it again
Oh, felt so good

Hey Mom
Since we're talking
What was it like when you were young
Has the world changed
Or is it still the same
A man can kill and still be the sweetest thing.

So I walked under a bus
I got hit by a train
Keep falling in love
Which is kinda the same
I've sunk out at sea
Crashed my car, gone insane
And it felt so good

So I walked under a bus
I got hit by a train
Keep falling in love
Which is kinda the same
I've sunk out at sea
Crashed my car, gone insane
And it felt so good
I want to do it again
I want to do it again

Ironic by Alanis Morissette

An old man, turned 98
He won the lottery, and died the next day
It's a black fly in your chardonnay
It's a death row pardon, two minutes too late
And isn't it ironic?
Don't you think?

It's like rain, on your wedding day
It's a free ride, when you've already paid
It's the good advice, that you just didn't take
And who would've thought? It figures

Mr. Play-It-Safe, was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase, and kissed his kids goodbye
He waited his whole damn life, to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought, "Well isn't this nice?"
And isn't it ironic?
Don't you think?

It's like rain, on your wedding day
It's a free ride, when you've already paid
It's the good advice, that you just didn't take
And who would've thought? It figures

Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out
When you think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up in your face

A traffic jam, when you're already late
A "No smoking" sign, on your cigarette break
It's like ten thousand spoons, when all you need is a knife
It's meeting the man of my dreams, and then meeting his beautiful wife
And isn't it ironic?
Don't you think?
A little too ironic?
Yeah I really do think

It's like rain, on your wedding day
It's a free ride, when you've already paid
It's the good advice, that you just didn't take
And who would've thought?
It figures

Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
And life has a funny, funny way, of helping you out
Helping you out

When we falter and fall. We don't know the right things to say. Just give me a minute, and I'll put things the right way. And we falter and fall.

I'm scared. I don't know you and you don't know me. It makes me wonder, it really does, how we ended up this way. Maybe it was a spur of the moment feeling or the sudden rush of things. How did it come to this, exactly? I constantly want you to approve of how I am and I do not feel the least bit secure that you will like me as who I am. It's just strange. It seems like were stuck in this situation already... Too much of this, a lack of that, there's something totally off. Sometimes I wonder about what you find in me and I in you. It may be partly true, and yes, we are here to find out, right? Oh great. I really want to keep this, or do I? I don't want another mistake. I don't want anyone to get hurt, not again. Will it be partly my fault? I'm cursed. A hug might not spare us. No, I'm not scared, I'm afraid.

I thought I saw a man brought to life
He was warm, he came around like he was dignified
He showed me what it was to cry
Well you couldnt be that man I adored
You dont seem to know, dont seem to care what your heart is for
But I dont know him anymore
Theres nothing where he used to lie
My conversation has run dry
Thats whats going on, nothings fine Im torn

Im all out of faith, this is how I feel
Im cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed into something real
Im wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
Youre a little late, Im already torn

So I guess the fortune tellers right
Should have seen just what was there and not some holy light
To crawl beneath my veins and now
I dont care, I have no luck, I dont miss it all that much
Theres just so many things that I cant touch, Im torn

Im all out of faith, this is how I feel
Im cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed into something real
Im wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
Youre a little late, Im already torn. torn.

Theres nothing where he used to lie
My inspiration has run dry
Thats whats going on, nothings right, Im torn

Im all out of faith, this is how I feel
Im cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed into something real
Im wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
Im all out of faith, this is how I feel
Im cold and Im ashamed bound and broken on the floor
Youre a little late, Im already torn